Adventurous Spirit

One thing I'm especially proud of with my son--aside from his friendly personality, adorable expressions, strong body, smart mind, great appetite, very few tears, improving sleep schedule, overall curiosity, cute babbling (and on and on and on)....is his confidence. At 9 months, Baby already has more sheer confidence than I do, certain that he can stand up on his own, reach down to pick up a toy, stand again, reach on tiptoe to grab another toy, open cabinets, get what he wants, etc. It started even earlier, when we could tell how badly Baby wanted to crawl even before his body was ready--he found his own ways to scootch himself backward and forward and he hasn't stopped moving and grooving since.

I hope this means he'll be a confident child and adult going forward. Except for when he clings a little extra tight to Mommy while Daddy runs the vacuum cleaner, Baby certainly doesn't act shy. He's comfortable having (most) strangers hold him, he smiles at almost everyone who smiles at him, and you can practically see the wheels in his head turning when he's faced with a challenge--"Mom's TV remote is on the other side of the couch. If I stand up and walk sideways, I can grab it!"

The pros of this are, of course, that he doesn't back down from challenges (except when he's feeling lazy and a more easily accessible toy distracts him). He is eager to explore so he can learn, which is really what most parents want for their baby. And I just love to see him learning and the smile of pride on his face when he accomplishes something. The cons of this, however, are that we have to watch him like a hawk lest he get himself into trouble. So far most of his explorations haven't caused too big a mess in our house. The trouble he causes is more of a risk to himself than anything else. He wants to eat cords. Or pull the trash can down on top of himself. Or climb up a hard metal cart. Or steady himself on a very unsteady rocking chair. Or stand up in the kitchen while wearing slippery socks. Or crawl off the bed.

For 9 months we managed to prevent Baby from getting injured other than that one time Mommy clipped his pinky nail too short and it bled, and the one time Daddy and Mommy watched proudly as he rolled independently across the floor, and then rolled his head into a sharp desk leg (no bleeding, just crying). But then came one terrifying moment where I got complacent. I knew that Baby was now crawling, that he was getting quicker, and rolling over constantly whenever we tried to change his diaper. I even purchased a giant playpen specifically so he would have a safe place to crawl at night in order to protect him from crawling off the bed. Then I set him down on the bed as we were getting ready for sleep, turned to get a pillowcase, and turned back to see him land like a pancake on the floor.

My breath catches in my throat still when I think about it.

We were lucky. At 9 months old, he's much sturdier than a 3-month old's fall would have been. Our bed is not super high. He landed flat instead of with any limbs at an angle. He didn't appear to even hit his head. But in that moment, we all froze, stunned (including Baby), and then he started to cry. Hubby scooped him up, crying himself, while I inspected him from every angle, scared to death that I'd permanently damaged my child and just needing to make sure he was okay. Between the two of us, Hubby and I calmed him down pretty quickly, so my "mommy instinct" told me that he really was fine, just startled more than anything. If something was really wrong--like a broken bone--he would keep crying. He would look different with swelling or a bruise. He would act different, favoring one side of his body or getting extra sleepy. But no, Baby was quickly smiling again, ready to get back to our bedtime routine. Still, we took him to an evening pediatrician and waited for over two hours just to be sure. Thankfully, he had no bumps, bruises, cuts, scrapes, redness, or out-of-the-ordinary behavior, and the doctor's best advice was to just watch him for a couple of days for any signs of an unlikely concussion, and to follow up with his regular pediatrician.

I woke up naturally about every hour that night just to be sure he was breathing. I spent the entire next day agonizing over why I had thought it was okay to set him on the bed, why I had thought it was okay to turn away, even for just a moment. I thought my husband would end up hating me for the rest of our lives. And then Hubby's aunt came over and also looked Baby over, and assured us that he was fine and that babies fall. She even told me the story of Hubby's cousin who fell off a washing machine and got a bump the size of a goose egg. I felt so relieved--not that I want to encourage placing Baby on top of high perches (he now sleeps on the floor in his playpen and I haven't let him crawl on the bed since). But she wasn't overly concerned. She wasn't upset or judgmental in any way. And neither was our regular pediatrician who also assured us that he looked perfect and that babies are going to fall. It's just another part of childhood. Another part of parenthood, where we have to learn that adventurous babies will get into scrapes. But also that we can't let our guard down when it comes to our very precious child.

Baby has seemed to accept the fact that we will be following him everywhere as he explores, responding by staying up playing later and later (he doesn't get tired until close to 9 or 10pm now). The good news is that--for now--he's only waking up to nurse once in the middle of the night, usually giving us a couple of stretches of 3-5 hours before and after the feeding. Aside from the fact that new exploration means new dangers, I have to admit that having a 9-month-old who can do so much and is so adventurous is also a lot of fun. Every age so far has been cute and fun, but boy does it put a smile on our faces when Baby opens a cabinet on his own, rises to his knees then pulls to a stand, then turns to smile at us as if to say, "Look what I can do!"

"Yes, Baby. Mommy and Daddy saw. We're amazed, and nervous, and always so proud of you."